Thursday 10 October 2013

Day of sorrow or day of liberation

Today was supposed to be an all important day in my life. The judgement day. I vividly remember the day I was married, I was a bag of mixed emotions - happy, excited, worried, relieved, jubilant. Today is another such day but while that was a happy mix, today is a not so happy mix. I am happy but I am worried too.. There is a sense of finality but its nothing that I wanted. May be somewhere deep down I was waiting for a miracle, a magic wand that would set everything right. The if only's haunt me. I have been fighting the battle for freedom, the battle for hope for a very very long time now on a directionless path and now when the direction is crystal clear I find myself longing for the other direction. I am tired, I am exhausted and today it almost seems like a curse that I am in this position. I do not know if the pieces of my life are falling apart or they are falling in place, but falling they are.

2 comments:

  1. i will not say i understand but will just say that believe in what you are doing. God has given us women great powers not only just to endure pain given by others but also to change things and show those others that we can sustain without them and in a much better way!

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  2. Thanks Supriya :) Certainly with abusive men, we women are better off without them than with them!!

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